> > Gentle thoughts for today.
> > > Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car. > >
When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself. > >
A penny saved is a government oversight. > >
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment. > >
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends. > >
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. > >
He who hesitates is probably right. > >
Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are ' XL.' > >
If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody. > >
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame. > >
The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
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There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt .> >
Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS' together it spells 'Theirs?'> >
On Aging: > >
Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it. > >
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for. > >
Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know 'why' I look this way. >
I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved. > >
When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra. > >
You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks. > >
One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young. > >
Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable. > >
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Then you forget to pull up your zipper. >
